I apologize for the delay in writing this as I was travelling from USA to India, over the weekend and was unwell yesterday.

Gurajaada Apparao in his most famours Telugu Drama “Kanyashulkam”(A sexist’s antonym for dowry) wrote about a ritual back in the early 19th century where old men who lost their wives gave money to the parents of younger women mostly kids under-age who were either widowed or poor. As the country progressed, the ritual just changed its direction and men started expecting money from parents of the girls for winning bread for the family. What should have been ideally a token of appreciation willingly and happily gifted on has now turned into a demon worthy of admonition as the greedy began to misuse/misinterpret/misrepresent the infamous ritual.

Blame it on the expectations set by the earlier episodes of the show, which made me to assume it often as an emotional tear fest, the third episode of Satyamev Jayate has been hugely underwhelming. Maybe, there weren’t many sad stories, no cases to be fought in court, not much research shown and the question to the country at the end of the show is so dumb sigh! Sigh! O Aamir! why? When the episode was titled “The Big Fat Indian Wedding” as opposed to “Evils of Dowry” or some such inanity, I was tempted at the thought of what all ills of marriage it might unearth but sadly, dowry is the one thing it speaks about. Jokes apart, the issue remains grave all the same.

The stories shown in the show are cringe worthy and can make us wonder what is that about money that has made people commit the said atrocities. We as a country take great pride in our marriage system and celebrate the occasion with élan giving it everything we got. But ironically, it might all end up being an atom bomb. Dowry or no Dowry, marriage is a difficult thing to sustain and for it to be the Agar batti that Aamir has proclaimed, money should not even figure in the list of things to be bothered about for a start for the simple fact that no amount of money can quell the greed if that is what demands the money.

Contrary to the issues shown in earlier episodes, where there was little hope or help expected from the judicial system, dowry has some strict laws against it and exploitation of females under the name of dowry means major trouble to the perpetrators in most parts of the country. However, all the laws on earth can only do as much if the couple wants to hush up the issue for any reason. With the wife and husband relation being so intensely personal it becomes the prerogative of the man to ask himself the question that Aamir asks him at the end of the show.

The Big Fat Indian Wedding as a phase should signify the importance we place on marriage as a milestone in our lives and the esteem with which we regard it with, but it should never be confused or misread with being unaffordable opulence.

PS: My apology at the start of the article was not due to my misconception that there are hordes of people waiting to read it. It was just a way of saying to myself that I need to be regular and I don’t miss too many of the things I want to do going forward.