As I drove home for one last time on a working day this month, the overbearing thought for the day has been that I haven’t borrowed a single Rupee in this month. I wanted to say it aloud to myself again and savor it, much like how I would let a sip of scotch float in my mouth, lilting on my tongue, for a while longer than I do for its desi counterparts. This is indeed a phenomenal achievement, and a moment to be acknowledged, relished and celebrated, for these things never happen frequently. It hadn’t happened with me for the entire year prior to this month, which is not very surprising given my lack of discipline towards everything in general, and spending money in particular. So when I realized that my hand wasn’t outstretched to face the sky so far in this month, a sharp pang of ecstasy kicked in.

I think we need a bit of context here, because of what use is an achievement if it can’t be put into perspective? Ever since I started earning, the number of months where my income took care of my whole expenses can be counted on fingers. There was always one last pair of jeans, or a movie and dinner with colleagues for no reason, or another trip to some place, that I succumbed to by borrowing. It became almost a habit, and I started feeling comfortable about it, so much so that even when I exhausted my money 10 days before the last working day, I was confident that I could get through. Mind you, I never cut any of my expenses just because I didn’t have money. I watched the same number of movies, bought popcorn along with every one of them, boozed my way out of the weekends, everything despite being impecunious. So, this is a strange new feeling I have today that I haven’t borrowed, or used even a credit card to get through this month (My misadventures with this curious little plastic thing will need another post on its own, so I’ll save it to another day).

Quite how I managed this feat is not something I can possibly fathom, given that my day to day expenses have not been reduced considerably. I watched a couple of movies lesser than what I would on an average month, but surely that can’t amount to much. I have not planned my expenditure based on the earnings, and even if I did, the calculations can’t be as precise as to let my salary last exactly till the last working day, so this may remain forever to be a mystery. Which is a shame, coz I may have stumbled upon the perfect formula by a random accident, but I don’t know how to benefit from it in further months, and I reacted just how I would to a random accident, by thinking that it won’t happen to me. And before you think of asking, I haven’t been promoted, changed my job to put my skillset into better use in a better profile with a guaranteed work-life balance (read: higher salary).

Even as I let the initial euphoria of the realization sink in, I can’t help thinking what this meant to my acquaintance-friends, colleagues, managers, close friends, cousins, blogger friends, neighbors, and their cousins on Facebook, GTalk, Whatsapp, Hike Messenger, Skype, Over the separating wall, at a cinema queue, near a wine shop, grocery store, at their cubicle, at my cubicle, at canteens and food courts, etc. and etc. I think they would have been silently glad and thanked their stars, not to see an ominous looking, rather sheepish, “hi” in their chat window, especially in the last week of this month. The "hi" was usually followed by a lot of uncomfortable silence, and erasing what we have typed so as to see what the other was about to send, before getting tired of that and blurting out directly for a hand out.  I think, in the end, everyone would have been quite happy about this month, though they would have no idea that they were. 

Just as I’m about to finish this, my mobile blinks and shows me that my salary has been credited, and since I’ve survived the 31-er May, 30-er June should be a walk in the park, even if things turn otherwise, I’m confident I can find someone in that park to bail me out.